Family

What if you could rewrite your life?

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Ever have one of those days?

Ever have one of those days where the “What ifs…” begin to wander in and you start to think about what you would have done differently? What you would do if you could go back and start over?

I may or may not be having one of those days; but, as my pen layed on the notepad in front of me, I had a moment of creative inspiration with an app on my phone so I decided to record it and create. I guess, for a moment, I was being philosophical.

So, tell me, have you had one of those days? Or, moments? Tell me your “blank page” moment/story in the comments – what would you do if you could rewrite your life?

Accountability of Weight: Update #9

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Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

This is the ninth update on this project. I started a year-long project of returning my physical self to a much lighter, and healthier, version of the past.

I’ll try to keep it short so as to not bore you with lots of details and try to just cover some of the lowlights and highlights, cutting to the chase at the end.

Lowlights:

I am sure you are all aware of this already, but we are getting into “eating season.” Yeah, that time of year where it seems to be endless gatherings centered around food and family and friends. We have had two birthday parties this month with copious amounts of food and we are just two weeks away from Thanksgiving. Then come the Christmas parties and more birthdays and then Christmas dinner. It that were not enough, that is followed one week later by New Years parties…this stretch between November 1 and January 2 is going to be a challenge for the waistline no doubt about it.

Any way, learning to maintain control and portion size it not an easy thing, right? I mean, after all, that is how be all tend to get out of shape and overweight so as eating season has returned I need a reminder every time I step up to the plate that I need to control myself and not go overboard. So far, reminders ignored. Am I a lost cause?

Highlights:

The elliptical is up and running after repairs and I have been using it a couple mornings each week before I telecommute for work. It has been good to get a sweat on before work (even if I am at home) and then get a shower in to head into the day refreshed. The time on the machine passes quickly with an episode (22 minutes) of Friends and some scrolling (8 minutes) on the phone.

If I were maintaining weight, I would be killing it! LOL I guess it is good that I haven’t really gained weight since I began the process. Obviously I am more aware of what I am doing, just motivated enough to take it to another level yet. Not sure why. But, again, there is nothing gained.

The Chase:

210.0  = official starting weight 2/15/18

   7.4   = pounds lost as of the morning of 11/12

202.6  = current weight

Your thoughts, encouragement, and good juju as the journey continues is much appreciated! Slow, or lack of progress doesn’t feel good and so some extra motivation is helpful. If you have ANY words of wisdom, it would be much appreciated at this point.

 

Accountability of Weight: Update #8

blue tape measuring on clear glass square weighing scale

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

This is the eighth update on this project. I started a year-long project of returning my physical self to a much lighter, and healthier, version of the past.

I’ll try to keep it short so as to not bore you with lots of details and try to just cover some of the lowlights and highlights, cutting to the chase at the end.

Lowlights:

It has to get worse before it can get better, right? Isn’t that what we tell ourselves? Yes, I know, we shouldn’t do that but that is all I can hold on to at the moment…

Progress? Yeah, not so much. Holding steady? Yeah, pretty much. This is a lot harder than I thought it would be! In fact, it’s become a chore. I was hoping it wouldn’t get to this but now it feels like it will never get better. How do I change this attitude? Better yet, how do I change? There doesn’t seem to be any motivation left in me.

The elliptical I got used, broke. Well, not completely, but I am working on repairs and the parts are on their way.

Highlights:

I am still tracking the food intake, but it doesn’t seem to make a difference if I stay under the calorie count. Well, at least it isn’t making much difference in losing weight. It is helping to maintain where I am currently at – which is less than when I started but well above where I would like to be.

I can’t come up with any. It is hard to stay positive when you see little to no progress.

The Chase:

210.0  = official starting weight 2/15/18

   7.2   = pounds lost as of the morning of 10/16

202.8  = current weight

Your thoughts, encouragement, and good juju as the journey continues is much appreciated! Slow, or lack of progress doesn’t feel good and so some extra motivation is helpful. If you have ANY words of wisdom, it would be much appreciated at this point.

 

In the land of self-identification

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The idea of self-identification is absurd, a scam really. It is fraught with so many contradictions that society can’t keep up, so it just keeps creating more exceptions to make it float. Logic, rational, and even science are disregarded as “false” because it doesn’t fit with one’s idea of who they want to be. There is no rhyme or reason, it is “just because I want to.”

So, I have decided to join the conversation with my own self-identification.

From now on, I am going to identify as a 67-YEAR OLD, RETIRED WHITE MALE.

I am really 46, but that is beside the point. Who are you to tell me that I can’t be a retired 67 year old male? Are you going to deny my the right to identify as I please?

Now that I am retired, I am no longer going to show up at work. Why would I? I am retired. However, my work will now have to grant me my pension and continue to pay me on a monthly basis based on my past employment.

Also, since I am now retired, the government can start paying me my social security and medicare/medicaid benefits as well. How much should I receive in benefits? Well, that is hard to determine since I haven’t continued to work for the next 21 years. But, let’s assume that my current wage will increase on an average of 5.4% (plus, COLA and inflation)per year. Once my highest wage has been calculated then they can figure out my benefits. I want them now, I am retired.

man and woman sitting on brown wooden bench

Photo by Monica Silvestre on Pexels.com

Oh, call AARP too. I want my membership card. Watch out everyone who has senior discounts at your stores and restaurants, I am coming for those benefits as well.

Hmmm, what other benefits can I derive from my new found identity?

Um, what?? You don’t like this idea?? Wait, you say I can’t do this?? Why??

Are you discriminating against me because of my age? That makes you an “ageist” and that is illegal.

Are you discriminating against me because I am a male? That makes you “sexist” and that is illegal.

Are you discriminating against me because I am white? That makes you “racist” and that is illegal.

Are you discriminating against me because I haven’t made enough money or because I make too much? That makes you an “economist.” Oh wait, probably not that but…hell, I don’t know, but is probably has something to do with socioeconomic status…

I think you get the point. At least I hope you do. I am RETIRED. Nothing you say or do can deny me of this right.

Now, give me my money and benefits before I take you to court and sue your ass.

School Picture Thievery

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It’s that time of year again, folks!

This school picture thing is a pretty big racket if you ask me, and if you’re a parent you know what I am talking about. If there is any place you know it and can feel yourself being ripped off but can’t do anything about it, it is definitely with school pictures and sports team photos.

I have felt this frustration in the past, but it kind of boiled to a head this year when I went to order my daughter’s school pictures. It usually isn’t a big deal trying to order them, but being the “non-custodial” parent who usually gets the information second-hand sometimes it takes a while to get it done. (Yes, I realize I could just have photographer friend take the photo and avoid all the trouble so I guess I am a glutton for punishment).

Anyway, I logged onto the website with my special code and wanted to just download the image to my computer and then go have them printed in the quantities and styles I desired. So, I selected the outrageously overpriced digital image – $22. Say what? Yeah, you read that right…let’s do some quick math…

If a school has 300 hundred students and the photographer can get 60 students through a line and photographed per hour, then the photographer would work for five hours. The photographer is, most likely, using a digital camera to take said digital images @ $22 each, therefore making $1320/hr, or $6600/day. That is of course presuming that each parent purchases just the digital image, let alone one of the other overpriced packages they offer. Now we know not all parents purchase the pictures, but you get the idea.

So, after choosing the digital image for download I get to the check out page only to see that I am going to be charged a “Shipping and Handling” fee of $7. Uh, wait, what? I am downloading a digital image. Why is there a shipping and handling fee? What’s worse is that I can’t remove the fee either. The radial button is greyed out. I either pay the fee right now, or wait until the next day to call them. So, I opted to call the company the next day since surely the fee for a digital download isn’t $7 bucks…

I called the next day and waded through their automated answering system until I got to a real person to talk to. I explained my situation and asked if there was some kind of error on their website that wouldn’t allow me to remove the shipping and handling fee. The response?

“No, that is a flat fee we charge for all late orders.” 

Late? Yes, it is true I didn’t order when the pictures were taken in the fall, but your website says they can be ordered at any time until the following fall AND there is nothing to indicate this is a “late” order on the website. I was a little dumbfounded. I said, “You’re joking right? How does downloading a digital image warrant a $7 late fee or even a shipping and handling fee?”

“Well, we do have to mail you the rights release so you can have the picture printed.”

So what you’re saying is that you are going to charge me $7 to mail me a sheet of paper and an envelope that costs, at best, a stamp or maybe two? I said, “Listen, I understand it costs money to send a piece of paper and envelope out to me but I have ordered digital images from other photographers in the past and they didn’t charge me an extra fee for the rights release, they included it with the digital image download. Surely you have the ability to do that right? So, why would I need a piece of paper mailed to me? It takes less than three minutes to compose a generic email and attach two image files to it.”

“Ok, I suppose I could waive the shipping and handling fee. What email address would you like the images sent to?”

Thank you. Now was that so hard and how about you waive all shipping and handling fees for all digital downloads from here on out? I probably speak for everyone who has encountered this ridiculous fee. There is no reason for it other than you can, and you have families over a barrel. I would venture a guess that many people just pay the fee, which is sad.

Highway robbery, I tell ya, only there was no highway and the bandit holds parents and other family members hostage every dang year around school picture time.

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Accountability of Weight: Update #7

This is the seventh update. Now, just over six months ago, I started a year-long project of returning my physical self to a much lighter, and healthier, version of the past.

I’ll try to keep it short so as to not bore you with lots of details and try to just cover some of the lowlights and highlights, cutting to the chase at the end.

Lowlights:

Excuses. Not gaining, but not losing. I need to do better and stop rationalizing my eating.

Highlights:

I decided to invest in a used elliptical trainer. I picked it up and reassembled it after having to disassemble it to get it into my car. It is now in the garage and I have used it about two weeks, at 15-20 minutes at a time. Boy, am I outta shape! I do have some repairs to do on it. The electrical cord was damaged in the move and the electronics have stopped working. So, repairs are in order and I am gonna have to find some parts. Hopefully I can make that happen this next weekend.

The Chase:

210.0  = official starting weight 2/15/18

    7.4  = pounds lost as of the morning of 8/13

202.6  = current weight

Your thoughts, encouragement, and good juju as the journey continues is much appreciated! Slow, or lack of progress doesn’t feel good and so some extra motivation is helpful. If you have ANY words of wisdom, it would be much appreciated at this point.

It may be an uphill climb most days, but the view at the top is usually worth it!

The Debate: What is “Life”?

This is, apparently, life.

This is, apparently, life.

This, apparently, is not life.

This, apparently, is not life.

Science is an interesting thing. Much like math, you can pick and choose how to use it or interpret what it means.

It always amazes me that scientists can define “life” as a microscopic microbe (literally had to use an electron-microscope to see it because it is so tiny) and yet fail to see a fetus in a womb as “life”. The definition of “life” on biology-online.org seems pretty clear to me.

This article, “Critters found in Antarctic ice show how tenacious life is,” has me in a feisty mood. “Life” as they claim can apparently exist in the most inhospitable environments (including space, maybe) but “life” can’t exist in the most protective and nurturing of places, like a woman’s womb. At least, that is if you are someone that supports abortion.

Here is another one of those weird (not really, but we’ll call it that) things that seems hard to justify. If you are a criminal and happen to kill a woman who was pregnant, you can be charged with murder of the fetus in 38 states in the United States. However, if you are an abortion doctor, you apparently exempt from these laws? What gives?

Ok, I’ll get off my soapbox, for now. Anyone else not understand these obvious inconsistencies?

Wanna join me on the box? Add your two cents below.

Accountability of Weight: Update #6

person on elliptical trainer

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

This is the sixth update. The mid point. Half way. The in-between. Half full, half empty. Six months ago I started a year-long project of returning my physical self to a much lighter, and healthier, version of the past.

I’ll try to keep it short so as to not bore you with lots of details and try to just cover some of the lowlights and highlights, cutting to the chase at the end.

Lowlights:

Well, folks, I am in about the same place I was last month. I did, for a short time, lose an additional two pounds but I have gone back to where I was the month before. At least I can say I am consistent, right? Yeah, not exactly the kind of consistent I wanna be.

Highlights:

I have now done a week of pushups. 25 a day for 7 days. I should be doing 50 every day by the end of the month.

I have also decided to invest in a used elliptical trainer. I used to use one in the past when I was really getting things under control. That was about 10 years ago and at the time I was only about 8 pounds from my goal weight. A lot has changed in the last 10 years but I do know I can be successful using that tool so I am going to give it a shot again. I have seen some nice used ones on one of the sales apps, so I don’t think I will have to invest too much to make it happen. Once installed in the garage, it will be easier to have access on a regular basis.

The Chase:

210.0  = official starting weight 2/15/18

    6.2  = pounds lost as of the morning of 8/13

203.8  = current weight

Your thoughts, encouragement, and good juju as the journey continues is much appreciated! Slow, or lack of progress doesn’t feel good and so some extra motivation is helpful. If you have ANY words of wisdom, it would be much appreciated at this point…and if you are wanting to make a change too, perhaps a friendly challenge would be a good motivator.

It may be an uphill climb most days, but the view at the top is usually worth it!

Not Just Fishing – An open letter to my dad

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Sunrise @ Nootka Sound, Vancouver Island, BC, Canada

7/22/18

Dad,

I just wanted to take a moment and let you know how much I really appreciated the fishing trip to Canada this year. I know I said “Thank you” in person, but it just didn’t seem like enough. I have so much gratitude for what you have done and the chance you have given me and my daughter to do this together. There are a lot of things I want to say, so I will do my best to convey them concisely so I get them all in.

Thank you for the work you put in so many years ago. Thank you because the work you did in the past, owning a business and investment properties, has paid off. Over the years there have been many fishing trips with you, and typically there is very little cost to me or my siblings when we have decided to go. You have always covered the majority of the costs, leaving us with minimal expenses to and from the fishing location. I realize this isn’t without a substantial cost to you. I also realize that you have the means to do it because of the wise choices you have made in the past and the hard work that was involved with that. God has blessed you because of your choices and your faithfulness. Thank you, because it hasn’t gone unnoticed

Thank you for the memories you created in the past. As I mentioned before, there have been many times in the past that you have taken me, my siblings, or all of us at one time

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Another sunrise.

or another on a fishing trip. Whether it was individually or together as a group, there was something special about it. We had time to talk, to share, to be in God’s great creation. We’ve seen the beauty of His wonder and marveled at the spectacular sights. We’ve laughed at situations we have found ourselves in, we have laughed at each other, we have grumbled a little (ok, sometimes a lot), and we have felt loved no matter what. As I sat on the boat, waiting for a fish to take the bait, I realized that all the years of trips to remote places are some of the best memories I have. They aren’t necessarily specific, though there are many of those, but they all just kind of blend together to create a collage of memories that involve a fishing pole, water, and fish. Whether it was standing in the rain next to a stream or baking in the sun on the ocean, those are memories to be carried for a lifetime. Talking about life, playing games together in the camper or lodge, dragging in small fish and big ones too, those are memories that have an impact.

Thank you for letting me include my daughter this year. I have to admit that I was a little apprehensive to have her come along since she would have to get up early, not have much access to the internet and her friends, and that sometimes fishing can be boring. I know she can be difficult, especially now in her teen years, as the attitude can run amok and make things not so enjoyable for those around her. I was excited, however, for her to experience the things I did when I was a kid. I have memories of fishing with you, obviously, but there are also memories in my head of fishing with grandpa and grandma too. Those memories are a little fuzzy as I was really young, but they are there nonetheless and they make me smile. So, I was anticipating this trip and having a chance for her to fish with you. I could not wait for her to have what I had as a kid.

As the trip unfolded, and now as I look back, I think there is some obvious evidence that she had a good time, despite the challenges I was anticipating. There was some grumpiness, but not nearly to the level that I feared. I think a large part of that was because of you. You were patient with her, spoke to her with love, and didn’t push her to do too much. How do I know she had a good time? Did you hear those giggles and see those smiles? She did a lot of laughing, at us mostly, but it was worth it! And the smiles? img_4932Well, who can’t help but smile after working hard to get a fish in the boat? The fact that they were her first ocean fish makes it even better! She reeled in by herself a giant Yellow Eye she couldn’t keep (and her disappointment in that) was surpassed by the joy in getting her first King salmon. Regardless of whether she did it by herself or not, you were there the whole way and coaching her with patience and love. It was awesome to watch you two, working together, to make that history happen. Thank you. It is another special memory for me to tuck away and hold onto. I also know that she will do the same, though she may never express it.

Another thing I realized while sitting on the boat this time around is that we weren’t “just fishing.” I couldn’t help but think of a country song by Trace Adkins that has been on the radio for some time now and as I ran through the lyrics in my head I couldn’t help but relate to the song on a deeper level. I think it not only relates to the experience my daughter just had, but I think back over my time fishing with you and it also applies to me (though the details are obviously different). Sure the words may not apply directly to her, or to me for that matter, but the message of the song clearly does. There was always more to this trip than just fishing. In fact, it has always been that way but it took this trip for me to see it. This time for me as the father.

The fish were not plentiful this time and the frustration of not getting them in the boat may have shown a time or two, but what was plentiful were the memories being made and that is what really lasts forever. Thank you for taking the time to make those memories with me so long again (and continue to make) and for taking the time now to make those similar memories with my daughter, your granddaughter. They are incredibly special and I appreciate the chance to make them with her.

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First King salmon (Chinook). 16 pounds of rod & reel fun! Look at the smile!

Who knows what the future holds? No one. We may never get to do it again, or at the very least she may never choose to do it again, but either way the memories will endure. There will come a time when we can look back and remember those times, those laughs, those smiles, those giggles. I hope there are more chances in the future to make more memories like that, but if not then I am happy to tuck these away and cherish them as priceless treasures.

Thank you. Thank you from me. Thank you from my daughter. Thank you.

Love,

your son

 

Accountability of Weight: Update #5

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This is the fifth update for the year-long project of returning my physical self to a much lighter, and healthier, version of the past.

I’ll try to keep it short so as to not bore you with lots of details and try to just cover some of the lowlights and highlights, cutting to the chase at the end.

Lowlights:

Guys, I am not gonna lie, progress has been terrible. Actually, even using the word “progress” is wrong. Since the last update a month ago, I have gained some of the weight back and I am just not seeing the results I hoped for. Of course, we aren’t talking about a huge amount of weight gain, but when you are trying to celebrate positive movement it is hard to be happy about this.

Circumstances aren’t supposed to dictate how we feel, but right now I am not happy about my progress, or lack thereof. The last month has seen a change in the way I eat (as in I am eating more than I should) and there has been less activity (which is minimal already).

Highlights:

  1. Ummm….
  2. I am not dead yet.
  3. The scale sighed when I stepped off…

So, that wraps up this portion of the show. Let’s cut to the chase…

The Chase:

210.0  = official starting weight 2/15/18

    3.4  = pounds lost as of the morning of 6/10

206.6  = current weight

Thanks for you thoughts and encouragement as the journey continues! Lack of progress doesn’t feel good and so that should encourage a change. If you have ANY words of wisdom, it would be much appreciated at this point.

It may be an uphill climb most days, but the view at the top is usually worth it!